Borrowed Traditions

 Holi colors in the spring, Wine festivals in Summer, Oktoberfest in the fall, Diwali lights in November, and Christmas markets in December. Living between India and Germany for 25 years taught me that integration isn't about replacing your traditions—it’s about becoming a cultural collector. 

Welcome to Unapologetically Both. Today we dive into the pure joy of 'Borrowed Traditions.

When I first moved to Germany 25 years ago, I fell into the trap that many immigrants fall into. I thought I had to make a choice. I thought that to embrace my new European life, I had to let go of the festive, colorful world I left behind in India. But that's not true. Soon I realized , there is a pure  joy in collecting traditions instead of replacing them. 

Let’s look at the sheer energy of these celebrations . Think about Oktoberfest and Holi. On the surface, they couldn't look more different. One is a historic Bavarian festival in a massive beer tent; the other is an ancient spring festival born in the heart of India. But structurally? They are doing the exact same thing. They are spaces designed to break down social barriers. When you are throwing colors at a complete stranger during Holi, or standing arm-in-arm on a wooden bench singing folk songs with a local German at Oktoberfest, the usual social distance melts away. As an expat who has built a massive community here in Heidelberg, I have 'borrowed' both of these energies. They are tools that allow us to step out of our structured, professional boxes and simply laugh together.

Then comes sunny summer months and I pair that deep Indian love for vibrant, open-air community gatherings with the classic local lifestyle and enjoy wine hikes and wine festivals in my region. Wear hiking shoes, pack small backpack with water and small snacks and walk through gorgeous vineyards enjoying wines from different wine stands on the way with friends , cheer with strangers.  I get to borrow the quiet, intentional peace of the local culture, inject it with that uninhibited, chaotic Indian warmth, and create my own vibe. I don’t choose between them—I just collect them.

And then come the dark months of winter, where the magic of borrowed traditions truly shines. In late autumn, I light the diyas for Diwali, filling my home with light to celebrate this beautiful festival of lights. And just a few weeks later, the exact same windows are lit by the fairy lights of a German Christmas tree.

There is an old, rigid way of looking at integration that says you must overwrite your past to belong in your present. But true belonging is additive. When I walk through the Heidelberg Christmas markets, smelling the cinnamon and roasted almonds, drinking mulled wine, I don't feel less Indian. And when I celebrate Diwali in Germany, I don't feel like an outsider. 

By borrowing these traditions, my year has double the joy. I haven't lost my culture; I’ve expanded my horizon. 

When you are living between the cultures, you should stop asking Which tradition should I keep? And instead you start asking, "What brings joy? What creates connection? What reminds me to celebrate life.

Today, my home reflects that journey. There might be Indian spices in the kitchen. A Christmas party  in December. Music from one country. Food from another. Friends from ten different nationalities sitting around the same dinner table. Sometimes we celebrate Diwali. Sometimes Christmas. Sometimes someone's birthday. Sometimes Iranian New year, sometimes enjoy the traditional Egyptian food cooked during Ramadan.

Living between the cultures has taught me that identity doesn't have to be protected behind walls. It can be enriched through open doors. The more traditions I've embraced... the richer my own life has become. Christmas has never made me less Indian. Celebrating Diwali has never made me less at home in German.

So here is my challenge for you  Look at the cultures around you—whether you are an expat in Germany, a global traveler, or living in your hometown. Stop viewing other people's traditions as a spectator. Borrow one. Adopt a ritual that brings you joy. Learn the story behind it.

Life is far too short, and the world is far too complicated, to only celebrate the days you were assigned at birth. Collect the joy.

This is Unapologetically Both.

And this is where we stop choosing between traditions...

and start collecting the ones that make our lives richer.